
As I may have mentioned here before, I've been working on a new book for several years now. Not writing it yet, no. That would be too easy. Instead, I've approached this task in the time-honored way: by neurotically freaking myself out about whether or not I have a coherent subject to write about. This entails much agonized soul searching, metaphorical blood letting -- and lots and
lots of research. The research is mainly to determine if I am certifiably insane. I'm worried about this, as only those so certified are allowed to publish books -- a fact about the trade you'll be forgiven for not having known. Odd as it may seem, all this recent stuff about harebrained Nazis, 19th century trance-and-dentalists, 20th century eugenicists, Blavatskyites, blatherskites and other assorted nut cases including the seven dwarfs: Balmy, Dippy, Dopey, Jerky, Sappy, Wacky and Zippy...
...all this began as an attempt to get a sort of cultural handle on Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a la Christopher Lasch's The Culture of Narcissism: American Life in an Age of Diminishing Expectations. While this book lays out the real deal, it was published 25 years ago, and thus missed some of the more spectacular displays of dementia that have graced our so-called culture since. What is even more amazing than these displays themselves, is the fact that they are now taken by most of the populace as no more surprising than the appearance
of a new breakfast cereal. "Oh, you're a Pagan? A Wiccan? An Angel? An Indigo Child? An American Indian Wampum Wannabe? Oh, how nice for you! One lump or two?" Tracking the mushroom-like growth of these alternative spiritual options -- that is to say, idiot-fringe cults -- has become nearly as common as counting carbs. Personally, I'd like to add a few phrenological bumps to their noggins. One lump or two?
But my current problem in relating Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) -- as defined by the DSM-IV -- to New Age Nut-jobism (NAN) -- as defined by the phase of the moon -- is a spate of books purportedly about narcissism, but really about how to 86 that annoying guy in your life. Thus what is truly diseased, exploitative and depraved is made out by some sleight-of-hand pretzel logic to seem a scarcity of self-esteem, a lack of "care of the self," a deficit of imagined needs gone unmet. And thus are the tables turned, the planchette of the Ouija board churned, and what remaining bridges burned. Ignorance is wisdom as water is wine. And drunk on that inversion, these sullen monsters of ever inward indulgence delight in absolving themselves of relationship with any but themselves. Here's a handful of examples...
| BOOK TITLE |
TRANSLATION |
| When Your "Perfect Partner" Goes Perfectly Wrong: Loving or Leaving the Narcissist in Your Life |
Is he running roughshod over your plans for him? Laughing at your spiritual quest? Refusing to learn to fetch? Dump the bum. But do it with love.
|

from a review in: Small Press Bookwatch
October 1, 2004
via: HighBeam Research
Copyright © 2004 Midwest Book Review
Here is a self-help guide that teaches the reader to be alert for signs of egotistical and controlling behavior, a partner who can never be happy no matter what you do, and other red flags, as well as what to do to defend oneself from being a pawn in a sex game, caught in a replay of past abuse, surrounded on all sides by a family of narcissists, and coping with narcissists in the workplace or among one's friends as well as romantic partners. The true stories of those who weathered manipulation are sure to reverberate with anyone who has endured similar maltreatment and selfishness.
|
| BOOK TITLE |
TRANSLATION |
| Loving the Self-Absorbed: How to Create a More Satisfying Relationship with a Narcissistic Partner |
You really can't create a satisfying relationship with a narcissistic partner, and you know it. Dump the bum. But do it with love.
|
from a review in: Esquire
November 1, 2003
via: HighBeam Research
Copyright © 2003 Hearst Communications, Inc.
Things we won't be covering in the index this month: The Vincent Gallo truffle collection from Vosges Haut-Chocolate ... Battlestar Galactica: the DMD release ... Loving the Self-Absorbed: How to Create a More Satisfying Relationship with a Narcissistic Partner, by Nina W. Brown ... Serena Williams's acting debut on Showtime's Street Time ... The five-day, four-night "Conquering Your Everest" vacation for men at Miraval resort and spa.
|
| BOOK TITLE |
TRANSLATION |
| The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family |
He promised you Kansas, Dorothy, but now you're living in Trenton, NJ. Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain. Dump the bum. But do it with love.
|
from a review in: The New York Public Library Book of Popular Americana
January 1, 1994
via: HighBeam Research
Copyright © 2003 Hearst Communications, Inc.
The Wizard of Oz: the popular name for a juvenile fantasy that is the
principal American contribution to the fairy tale. It concerns the
adventures of a farm girl, Dorothy Gale, and her dog, Toto, in magical
Oz, whence they are transported by a Kansas tornado. Accompanied by
a scarecrow, a cowardly lion, and a tin woodsman, they follow a yellow
brick road to the Emerald City of Oz, where they enlist the help of the
Wizard to foil the Wicked Witch of the West and make their way safely
back to Kansas.
|
| BOOK TITLE |
TRANSLATION |
| Care of the Soul: A Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life |
You know how to get your spiritual needs met, girl. But he's just spiritually needy. Dump the bum. But do it with love.
|
from the book:
...but when our narcissism is transformed, the result is the love of self that engenders a sense of union with all of nature and things. You might say that we then have a shared narcissism, a mutual self-love, a kind of mystical consanguity among all creatures. Not shying away from mysticism, we might say that...
symptomatic narcissism can only be healed when it becomes a genuine religious virtue.
All human symptoms and problems, when they are taken to their depth and realized in a soulful way, find their ultimate solution in a religious sensibility.
|
| BOOK TITLE |
TRANSLATION |
| Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry |
Why are Granny's teeth so long and sharp? The better to eat you with, my dear. But he just doesn't get it, does he. Dump the bum. But do it with love.
|
from a review in: Publishers Weekly
July 31, 2000
via: HighBeam Research
Copyright © 2000 Reed Business Information
Clinical psychologist and business consultant Albert Bernstein's Emotional Vampires... is a humorous yet serious look at our interactions with people who seem to sap our energy. Through anecdotes, Bernstein... makes the various categories of vampires distinctive and recognizable (AntiSocial, Histrionic, Narcissistic, Obsessive-Compulsive and Paranoid) and offers practical guidance for how readers can deal with them effectively...
|
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